Monday, December 04, 2006

Celebs gone wild

It was quite the weekend for Hollywood's movers & shakers. Well in Rip Torn's case, former Hollywood mover & shaker.

Let's take a look at what kind of crazy shit was going down while us normal folk were at home minding our own business.

-Prison Break's Lane Garrison involved in fatal car crash
File this one under 'truth is stranger than fiction'. Lane Garrison, club-hopping co-star of the FOX hit nighttime soap Prison Break, was driving his Land Rover through Beverly Hills Saturday night when it jumped a median and struck a tree, killing a passenger and sending Garrison and two other occupants to the hospital.

But the story gets crazier from there. Apparently the passengers were teenagers whom Garrison encountered at a local supermarket; when they recognized the 26-year old, who played the sleazy snitch Tweener on the program until his character was killed off earlier this season, they asked him to accompany them to a party. In a move eerily reminiscent of a scene from an Entourage episode, Tweener obliged the 15 year-old male and his two 17-year old female companions and they all piled into the actor's truck. As they made their way around the LA area Garrison lost control of the vehicle and the accident occurred. The 15-year old was pronounced dead at the scene while Garrison & the females were rushed to a local hospital with non-life threatening injuries.

As details slowly begin to emerge we have learned that Garrison claims to have attended the party, where he had one drink (yeah right), and the actor also admits to drinking one margarita earlier that evening at a restaurant. After leaving the party he & the kids were headed back to Garrison's apartment, where he was supposed to meet up with his girlfriend. Police reports state that he displayed "symptoms of alcohol intoxication" and that numerous alcoholic beverage containers were removed from the vehicle after the crash. Garrison claims to have no recollection of the accident because he was rendered unconscious by the impact, and his high-powered attorney states that the vehicle has had alignment & brake problems recently. Hmmm. To make things even more interesting it appears Garrison was involved in a minor crash back in October when he was leaving the exclusive Hollywood hot spot Hyde, a place he has frequently been spotted at since he rose to fame due to the popularity of the show.

So let's get this straight- a (semi) famous celebrity who likes to party goes with 3 teens to a kegger, then invites the kids back to his pad (for what reason? draw your own conclusions, but my guess is that nose candy was involved) and on the way ends up rolling his truck and killing one of the passengers.

Sounds like Tweener is going to need Michael Scofield's help to get him out of this mess. Talk about life imitating art.

- Rip Torn busted for DWI- again
Legendary Tinseltown actor Rip Torn was arrested after an accident in Salem, New York for suspicion of drunk driving. Judging by that glorious mugshot I would say the suspicions are well-founded.

Torn was driving during the day when he crashed his vehicle and police arrived at the scene. I'm sure that after witnessing the 75-year-old actor in this state of confusion they immediately came to the conclusion that the actor, best known for his roles in Men In Black, Dodgeball, and HBO's The Larry Sanders Show, was obviously shitfaced.

Like Mr. Garrison this was not Torn's first encounter with the wrong side of the wheel. He was arrested in January 2004 after an alleged DWI when he crashed into a NYC taxicab, but the charges incredibly were dropped despite the cranky actor unleashing an expletive-laced tirade on the officers after his arrest. You can view that piece of priceless footage here.

For that previous indiscretion and this terrifically awful mug shot, Patches O'Houlihan is hereby entered into the Drunken Actors Hall of Shame.

-Britney finally dons britches but still flashes her booty
And last but not least what would a celeb update be without a glimpse of Britney Spears' private parts. The gum-chewing goober celebrated her 25th birthday at trendy Hollywood eatery Mr. Chow Saturday night, and wouldn't you know the "singer" was actually wearing panties for the first time in weeks.

How do we know this? Because the classless hillbilly was intent on showing everybody that she does in fact wear bloomers, even if they don't completely cover her ample ass.

To summarize Ms. Spears' behavior in recent weeks, she has befriended Hollywood heathens Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Brandon Davis, been photographed sans underwear at least 3 times, thrown a lit cigarette out of Paris' car (a violation of California law punishable by a $1000 fine) and now flashed her tushie for the whole world to see while wearing a dress apparently designed for a midget.

How sad is it that this girl may have actually been better off with legendary loser K-Fed?

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