Abreu & Bombers torch Rays 12-4

The Stankees and their fans found out why they obtained Bobby Abreu before the trading deadline,although his average(.344) ond OBP(.436) with NY had already been impressive.
But last night Stankee opponents found ouwow, these guys can hitt what a lethal weapon Abreu can really be for the already-loaded Bombers as he HAD 6 RBI IN THE FIRST INNING VS. THE D-RAYS. You read that right- he alone drove in 6 runs during the Stankee record 9-run first inning against the beleaguered Devil Rays, whose road record is uglier than the Washington Generals'.
Bobby the Basher (you know, the guy who was rode out of Philly after suffering a power outage following last year's HR Derby win) came up with 2 men on in his first AB and promptly crushed an offering from Tim "why am I in the majors again?" Corcoran off the facade in the upper deck, then came up again later in the inning and smacked a 3-run double off reliever Brian Stokes. Wow.
But the scariest part is after he tacked on his 7th ribbie in the 3rd on a sac fly he ALMOST HIT A GRAND SLAM IN THE 4TH INNING. That drive to deep right landed a foot in front of the wall and would have given him 11 RBI through 4 innings!
Now I'm the first one to criticize the Stanks and BrainDead Cashman, but this move is starting to look like THE move of the trading deadline. As the Sox sat idly by with their noses up Theo's ass, not wanting to shell out the necessary cache to bring Abreu to Beantown The Stanks swooped in with their barrellful of dough and may have brought the missing link to the Bronx. This coming on the heels of the grand larceny of Judas Demon in the off-season, and Theo and his Henchmen have more than egg on their faces from the way these deals have helped propel New York to the best record in baseball and an increasingly probable World Title this year. They have entire omelets on their smug mugs.